Archive for the 'My Marsupial' Category



M is for Mature, or Maybe.

Joey... 2 days old 11-6-97

Okay, change of plans. I had written another blog last night to post today but Joey’s topic of conversation tonight after the baseball game trumps it. Joey, for about a year now, has asked if he could play the video games Call of Duty and Halo on the XBOX 360. Every time, Julie and I have both responded with a quick “No”. See those two games are rated “M” for mature, and clearly at 13 he is not old enough. Ratings are ratings. His argument however, is one befitting of a teenage boy, “All of my friends can play, why can’t I? “I am the only 8th grader that does not play Dad.” “I’m left out of many conversations at the lunch table.” “Because I can’t play Halo, I’m a social outcast Dad, and everyone laughs at me because you’re the strictest parents ever!” (okay so I added the last one, he really didn’t say that, but that’s how I know he feels).

Joey has a good head on his shoulders. He excels in school. Tries hard. Does his homework, gets exceptionally good grades and has afternoons filled with extra curriculars (One of which is baseball which we just finished this evening.) He is very mature for his age. Joey could be nicer to his siblings, especially his sister, but again he is a 13 year old boy. My fear for letting him play those games stems more from messing with his innocence than whether he is mature enough to play them. Life is harsh. At times it can be down right cruel, and as parents isn’t it our job to protect them? Even when it’s obvious that we cannot? (I never said my argument was rational) Sometimes I forget that he is maturing at an alarming rate. Hell, he is a freshman next year. I still think of him as the tiny little guy that followed my every step. It’s quite hard to think of him as a young adult with his own opinions, stress, problems and hardships. I still have plenty of my own demons to deal with, how can I realistically help him navigate his? So will we let him play the mature games? Maybe. I’m not sure yet, but we will talk about it later after we are in the new house, and settled. Oh yeah the new house…that’s a whole ‘nother blogpost.

Bottom line is this: No matter how much I try, the reality is that Joey is getting older. And well, I guess am too.

Welcome to Toys”R”Us

SweetsA couple months ago Julie and I took our kids to NYC for the first time. Just a day trip. We took a Megabus from Baltimore, Maryland in the morning and left NYC that same night a 11pm. We did a lot of walking throughout Manhattan, and really pushed the limits of our three children. Thankfully Joanne, Julie’s younger sister was there with us to help wrangle to troops amidst the hustle and bustle of the New York City streets. This trip was the litmus test to a bigger more substantial one to NYC in the near future. Our first stop after getting off the bus was lunch. We took a b-line to the nearest New York Style pizza joint and exposed the kids to a true slice of pizza. I have to say it was fun watching Joey, Rebekah and Aaron try to pick up the large thin crust beauties expecting to eat them like a normal slice of a Little Ceasers Hot-n-Now large pizza. After some coaxing I finally got them to realize the folding technique, and while I am confident they didn’t really understand it at first, I know they were a fan after requesting another trip to the counter and ordering some more slices. Mission accomplished.

We also went into the new Harry Potter exhibition., M&M’s World, Lego, and The American Girl Place stores to pass the time, but nothing was better than walking in hand and hand with Rebekah into the multi-level Toys”R”Us in Times Square. Complete with a 60′ ferris wheel, and more toys than anyone could ever see in one 30 minute visit. Rebekah was very quick to say. “Wow Dad, this is the best day of my life… like ever!”

“Well, Rebekah,” I responded, “I am glad I just got to share it with you.”

Target of Brotherly Love.

Our ability to love stems from the brain, not the heart.  So why does the heart get all the love?Going to Target on a random evening is hardly the melting pot for inspiration on a blog post. Something about aisle after aisle of toasters, button down shirts, and built-your-own dinette sets I guess. But there is a first for everything.
For instance, I was in Target last week with my two sons, Joey age 13, and his little brother Aaron age 8. For Valentines Day, their Grandma Mayernik had sent each one of our three children a valentine with her signature 2 dollar bill inside. This two dollar bill put Joey over the edge on a DS game that he had been saving up for weeks. So into Target we strolled. Joey smiling ear to ear. Beaming with success of a job well saved. And as the Target employee ceremoniously turned the key on the game case I heard Joey utter an “Uh Oh”. As he looked through his folded up money he just pulled from his pocket. “Oh shoot,” he muttered again. Now he has the attention of his little brother Aaron. “What’s going on Joe?” he questioned. Joey turned to me and said “I don’t think I have enough to cover the tax.” Well I asked him “How much do you need? Do the math and let me know how much will be short.” So I watched Joey as he figured out in his head how much he needed. I could tell he was taking the price of the game multiplying that number and then adding the total all the while his head was bobbing from side to side. Aaron looked on with concern. He knew how long Joey had been saving for this game. “Shoot” Joey responded to me, defeated, he said “I need another $2.39″. Without missing a beat Aaron pulled from his pocket his “Grandma Mayernik 2 dollar bill” he had gotten that afternoon and another dollar he just happen to have in his pocket. Aaron handed Joey his 3 dollars and said with bold confidence, “Here Joey now you have enough for your game”. I thought to myself, “Wow…what kind of a guy tears up in Target, and in the electronic section no less?” A dad that’s proud of his kids. That’s who.

Happy Valentines Day.

Something Happened On The Way To Act Two.

My son Joey grew up.

Five years ago, when Joey was 7 years old, he was in his first musical stage production. Pittsford Musicals produced Fiddler On the Roof. I was fortunate to be cast as Avram, the loopy town crier, and Joey was one of the children of Anatevka.  Julie and I thought it would be a good experience for him.  You see, my son was very shy and we wanted to expose him to things that would help break him out of his shell.

At 12, he’s more mature now, with multiple shows to his credit.  Seeing him on stage Thusdsay for the opening night performance of Webster Thomas High School’s musical production of Bye, Bye, Birdie was a wonderful experience. Proof positive that we had the right idea five years ago.  For all who don’t know, Bye Bye Birdie is a campy, silly, and over-the-top musical set around the singer Conrad Birdie, Albert his manager, his secretary Rose, and the MacAfee family.  Conrad Birdie, the teen heartthrob has been drafted into the U.S. Army, and he is about to give his one last kiss to a lucky girl (15 yr old Kim MacAfee) before he goes off to war.  In the production the girls scream, swoon and faint for Conrad, much like girls used to in the 50′s and 60′s for Elvis, The Beatles, and Conway Twitty.  The musical is a satire of American culture, and the Webster Thomas Players deliver by keeping the energy up and the humor high.

I could not help but get very emotional during the Ed Sullivan scene.  Joey, as the son Randolph, and the rest of the MacAfee family sang in nice 4 part harmony.  Joey, for a brief moment sang by himself in front of 500 people.  No more is he that shy little boy.  No more does he search for confidence to get up in front of people to share his talents.   I should mention that he is still in middle school.  He’s performing with high school kids where some are four and five years older than him.  And he is holding his own.  I was a proud papa indeed.

And this was just act one, but it was what happened after the show that was even more touching.

In musical theater it’s customary to come out after the show’s end and say hello to friends and family that have come to see the performance. Joey and I did exactly that.  After opening the hallways doors that lead into the lobby outside of the auditorium of Webster Thomas High School there stood an arc of about seven or eight middle school aged girls waiting.  When Joey and I came through, these girls reacted to Joey like he was the rock star, like he himself was Conrad Birdie.  They screamed “There he is!”, “He’s sooo cute”, “Wow!” and “That’s him, that’s him!”  It was very sweet, and as a Father I could not help but feel joy for my son for some well deserved attention from the ladies.  But, the funny thing is Joey was oblivious to his new fan club.  So, I did what any father faced with this situation would do.  I placed my hands on Joey’s shoulders.  Stopped him, and turned his body right into the line of fire. All the while saying “Hey Joe, do you see any one you know yet?” I stalled for time long enough for Joey to realize the girls were looking at him.  Two of whom told him he was cute and that they each wanted a hug.  Joey, just stood there… frozen.  By now there is a crowd watching this exchange.  Parents and kids alike.  Finally I told him “Joey, for God’s sake give the girls a hug!”  Which he finally did and the girls swooned.

As I turned him away from his new fan club into the sea of the remaining people I could not help but smile.  I knew I just witnessed something that as a father I will cherish and remember for the rest of my days.  And though Joey may not realize it now, I would venture to think he, albeit for different reasons, will feel the exact same way.

God bless Conrad Birdie.

The Cupcake Birthday

On May 5th, 2000 my oldest son Joey turned two and a half.  That was a big deal.  For me, two and a half symbolized the last of the baby age milestones.  For all those who have children, the early milestones of three, six, nine, and twelve months carry special meaning.  After two and a half, it’s all about the birthdays, three, four, five and so on.  So when Julie and I told Joey that he was turning two and a half, it was a special day.  Joey promptly replied with “If I get cake on my birfday… I should get cupcakes for my half birfday, because cupcakes are smaller that birfday cakes.”  Thus a new family tradition was born.

Now, every year on our half birthdays our family celebrates with cupcakes.  No presents.  Just a reason to eat the tasty treats, and make someone feel special with some extra attention for making it another 6 months. Over the years we have shared this story with friends who have inquired, and some now even celebrate them in their own households.  Pretty cool since this idea came from Joey. What would be your cupcake birthday?

Maybe that day back on May 5th was Joey’s ploy for extra sweets.  Probably so, but what Joey inadvertently gave us was a family tradition that will live on long after me, Julie and even he, is gone.

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